You are in the Can 8 to 18 March 2012

YouAreHere started with Mall Stories on 8 March, download your copy here then traverse the Canberra Centre while writers such as Josh Inmania, Pete Huet, me and Julian Fleetwood take you on a guided tour.

Bad!Slam!No!Biscuit! is this year a sanctioned YouAreHere event, whatever sanction means, I presume the organisers are less fearful of what we do than last year. But 14 March is the night for Bad!Slam!No!Biscuit! hosted by JACINTA, Andrew Galan (that’s me), the Score Adder and The Master of Conflict.

From 13 to 16 March The Tragic Troubadours will be taking poetry to Canberra’s bus interchange, we offer you words in the sun, rain and/or wind as you wait for your bus between 8am to 9pm and 530pm to 630pm.

On 15 March there will be debate within Smiths Alternative Book[store/shop/front organisation]. You should be there for that, rebuttal should include arse-blocks from at least one Roller Derbyist but likely won’t, I get to debate, I never did this at school, I expect those on the other team did, they seem to know what they are doing and all reports are they seriously want to win, they probably went to good schools and had supportive parents who never said no.

I really want to check out Applespiel’s Morning Commercial Breakfast Radio Show in Tonic, Harvest and at Lonsdale Roasters so I will be going to their shows after completing mornings of The Tragic Troubadours in the bus interchange.

Finally for poetry we close the YouAreHere with Poetry is the Real Winner, curated by me.

P.S. I will also be performing a poetry set at Art Not Apart, so is Miranda Lello, come and listen to our poetry.

BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! @ The Phoenix, 19:30 Hours Wednesday 14 March

BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! RETURNS ONE TIME ONLY FOR THE FIRST TIME TO THE SECOND WEDNESDAY OF THE MONTH!

FOR YOU—ARE—HERE!

and that means we want your words in the Phoenix

AND YOU WILL BE THERE BECAUSE WE ARE THE ONLY SLAM THAT PROVIDES YOU WITH

two microphones, five judges, A MASTER OF CONFLICT, an audience, The Score Adder, two MCs, FIVE FIRST PRIZES, and the right to claim the title of

GREATEST SLAMMER OF ALL TIME AND SPACE

WHICH MEANS IF YOU WIN YOU CAN BE POSTERISED AS

TRANS-TIME UNIVERSE CLASS POETRY

and we’ll send you to Goulbourn

on foot

with a carrot

a carrot in flippers

and of course there is

beerslashciderslashwhiskeyslashbourbonslashshantiesslash

slashsomething else

that’s right, ‘cause we know it is all about the titles

and PRIZES

from Impact Comics, Mind Games, the Oxfam Shop (NO CHILDREN OR ANIMALS HARMED), Smiths Alternative Book[store/shop/front organisation]  and The Gorman House Markets.

and drinking

Now, not to get you too excited, but the silver lining of the clouds smashing the Can and Corinbank is that we also have all the prizes that Bad!Slam!No!Biscuit! was going to give away at Corin to give away to the First Prize Winner for Winning in the Can at the Phoenix!

To all potential five of the First Prize Winners for Winning!

YES WINNING!

So be at Bad!Slam!No!Biscuit! whether you think it’s a good idea or not, bring your judging, your words, your hands to clap with, your mouths to flap with, your original material, your two minutes, your no props, and join us to make BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! YES WE’RE GOING TO MAKE BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! and stamp it with a bird and tie it in twine and sell it as a zine.

BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT!

E-Q&A with Rosanna Stevens (READ THIS!)

For the YouAreHere Festival I was interviewed.

Follow this link to read my words, marvel at pictures, see the sight of hats, and wonder at the bits of paper.

8-18 March, Canberra, YOUAREHERE

Corinbank Festival 2-4 March 2012

I will be performing solo at the Corinbank Festival. 

On Friday night I am on at 11pm and Saturday night at 9 and 11pm, all at the Midway Marquee. Visit, listen to poems.

The Tragic Troubadours will also be roaming the paths of the festival at random times and I will be running BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! with The Score Adder, The Master of Conflict and Jacinta at the Bally on Saturday evening at 5pm.

Check out the list of performing artists here.

And the list of bands here.

My Favorite Bullet

When I was a kid growing up on the Central Coast of New South Wales I really loved the television show Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids.

My favourite character was Dumb Donald, that guy could tell a story about reptiles and his dad.

The poem "Moadeep and Paul meet on Allara Street or I wish I owned a Mateba Model 6 Unica" published by My Favorite Bullet in Volume XI Issue One has nothing to do with that television show or my love of it or have any relationship with Dumb Donald.

My Favorite Bullet.

BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! @ The Phoenix, 730PM Wednesday 15 February

As the boggle-eyed girl from season 4 of Whale Wars looks on still not saying anything we create BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! in February.

MARVEL AT THE SCREEN TIME WITHOUT WORDS!

And bring yourself with your words to

BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT!

because

we give you a stage a microphone an audience five judges

the Score Adder two MCs and

the Master of Conflict

all within easy reach of alcohol so that we can hear your words.

The spectacle

The words

Be speech-eyed

Be boggle-less

In the face of words

And then cheer, heckle or get back to your conversations

about that television/walk/awesome tie

show with the people in it.

YES

Words

BE AT BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT!

BOGGLE!

And this month we bring you direct from distant flooded banks

From the place that curses ‘cause they took our guns

From the land that according to Wikipedia

only has one famous person, Codie Simpson, whoever he is

We bring you the Broken Records Collective

CHEER!

For those who don’t know The Broken Records Collective

THEY TELL MYTHS TO BUS DRIVERS

AND MAKE US ALL LATE FOR WORK.

And have been doing this since 2010.

And they are a SPOKEN WORD COLLECTIVE.

And they have featured at the Woodford Folk Festival, at the Laura Street Festival in Uncle Bill’s Backyard, appeared at the Queensland Poetry Festival 2010, and are regular hosts and performers at Words or Whatever.

They will put a sling shot to the head of poetry

For you

BOGGLE

BUTYRIC ACID

GYOZA

And be at BAD!SLAM!NO!BISCUIT! with your words, your hands, your arms and legs, your voices, your original material to join Jacinta, The Master of Conflict, The Score Adder, Andrew Galan

and

THE BROKEN RECORDS COLLECTIVE!

Remember no props, 2 minutes, no music, and your original material at The Phoenix pub.